Validation

Although it's nice to have friends and family read what you've written and make acclimations bordering on Pulitzer critiques, a serious writer has to take such loving praise as just that, and look elsewhere for true validation of their work.

Writing groups, like mine which is stellar, can help with that.  They validate my work when it's warranted, but they are also brutally honest when I don't hit the mark, and they provide supportive criticism and suggestions which I find immeasurably helpful.

The most satisfying validation, however, comes in the form of an e-mail or letter from a publisher stating that they are going to publish your work.  I received one of those recently, and it has spurred me to work harder, edit better, and stretch myself creatively.  I'm really happy to announce that a story of mine, Our Spirit of Christmas, will be published in the upcoming Chicken Soup for the Soul: The Gift of Christmas, coming out in October.  It will be my first story in a book, rather than a magazine or regional paper, so this is big for me.  And this is a personal essay about my mother's gift to our family, so it means a great deal to me to have this story read worldwide, in a publication I've admired for years.

My point in this post is not to laud my most recent triumph - although I did want my readers to be aware of it - but to emphasize to those writers struggling with their own personal doubts to keep at it.  Read, take classes, attend seminars, join a writer's group - whatever it takes for you to get motivated.  It's true that the more you know about writing, the less you can tolerate bad writing, whether it's yours or someone else's.  You become more discerning, and, in that way, your writing becomes better.  Once you learn how to embrace that critic inside you as you write, you'll find that utmost validation coming your way more often.

In the last year, I know I have matured as a writer.  This most recent story acceptance does confirm that.  With that in mind, I'm back at my novel.  When I send it to agents, I want the confidence in knowing that it's good enough.  These last 50 pages will make or break the book, and I can't hurry that process.