Reflections On Mother's Day

My first thoughts yesterday morning focused on my mother; gone almost 17 years now (is that possible?) and yet still missed each and every day.  I found myself longing to hear her laugh, her positive voice and to look upon her face and wish her the best.  Instead, I had to be content with looking toward heaven and whispering, "Happy Mother's Day, Mom."

Enjoying the breakfast in bed my husband created for me, I wondered if our daughter and daughter-in-law were getting pampered in a similar fashion.  I doubted that our daughter was because she had to work a double shift (not fair was my reaction to that news).  She is working through some "teen-age issues" with her boys right now, so I sent positive vibes in her direction, knowing she would, as she always does, persevere until she had a solution for everyone concerned.  It's one of the hardest times to be a parent/grandparent; it's so difficult not to want to "make everything better" by intervening.  Instead, I just left a message on her phone letting her know what a great mom we think she is, and that we're here for her if she needs us. 

In the afternoon I received a visit from our son and daughter-in-law and our youngest grandson, who came with flowers and a handmade card from our grandson that delighted me with its original crayon and sticker message.  We gave our daughter-in-law a plant to add to her ever-growing garden, and a handwritten note that expressed our joy at having her for a second daughter.

The rest of my day was free from chores or  responibility.  I read, napped, watched movies, deemed myself lucky to receive several "Happy Day" calls and messages from good friends, and relaxed with my favorite guy as we indulged in food and wine.

I know I'm a lucky woman to have such caring and love, and to have had so many wonderful years nurturing and revelling in my children and grandchildren.  Of course, those times have not been without some heartache, anxiety, and pressures I never could have foreseen, but it's the rewards which have always followed that I dwell on.  I have that outlook because of  what I learned from my mother, and I hope I can leave a similar legacy to both my daughter and my daughter-in-law.     

Letter Writing Lives Here

I have an old friend who calls me "the Hallmark lady" because I always remember to send cards, with personal notes inside, for the special occasions of friends and family.  It's an important habit for me, and another one is the subject of today's post: letter writing.

I will admit I don't write as many letters as I used to, but I've made a recent commitment to change that because I think it's a necessary part of living that needs to be preserved.  Plus, I get great satisfaction out of penning personal thoughts and stories of recent happenings in my life, and sending them off in a stamped envelope to people I care about.

I'm not alone in this venture, I've learned.  There are many others who agree with me that keeping the art of letter writing alive is worth the time.  Just do an online search of "letter writing" and read about all those who consider it a rewarding activity.  My favorite is a website called the Letter Writers Alliance.  It was started about five years ago by two women in Chicago; Kathy Zodrozny and Donovan Beeson.  Check out this site - their dedication to this effort, coupled with interesting history, anecdotes, photos, and blogs all combine to inspire.

This is an international movement as well.  As an example, the BBC did a story on "the importance of paper correspondence".  Now, I'm not - nor is the Letter Writers Alliance - anti-technology.  E-mail has its purpose and the LWA refers to its website as its "clubhouse".  But consider what a recipient receives when they open their mailbox and discover something besides junk mail and bills.  That's reason enough, even before considering the caring message such effort sends to that person.  Plus, it's just as rewarding to the writer of a letter; trust me on this.

One of my favorite examples of how sending a letter can impact a life focuses on Honor Flight Chicago, an organization that takes WWII vets to Washington DC by plane, gives them a tour of the WWII Memorial and other historic sights of our Capital and then, on the flight back, they receive "mail call"; handwritten letters from friends, family, and even strangers that the veterans say touch them the most about this experience.  Just imagine their reaction to words of thanks from so many; that's an image worth motivating you to take the time to sit down with pen and paper.

The book I'm working on now will take the reader from the present to the time of WWII.   One of my aims in the storytelling is to focus on the differences of the two societies and how our present can always learn from the past.  In that past were many elements of humanity that can be embraced still, and make us the better for pursuing them.  I think the time taken to write a letter is one of those.  

Getting Back To It

I was shocked when I viewed my blog this morning to discover that my last post was three months ago!  And it didn't say much - other than I was sick.  That sickness did linger on into March, off and on, and did cause my creative world to come to a halt.  But still.  I should have been keeping up with the blog regardless of my personal circumstances.  Right?

Well, not really.  I was concentrating on getting my physical being back in order so that I could function on all cylinders and get back to pursuing my creative side again.  But being out of it for so many months meant that I had a lot of other things to focus on before I could give my attention to writing.   Family issues, commitments, helping my husband rekindle his art business; the list goes on.  And I knew I was putting my writing on a back burner but it was necessary.

But now I'm physically strong, mentally organized and ready to get back at it.  I'm not bemoaning the time flown by as time lost, though.  I really think the best is yet to come in 2012.  Hang in there with me and see if I'm right!  

Update on me

For those of you regular readers, I just wanted to let you know I am alive and mostly well.  The holidays were relaxing and filled with family fun, then I got sick on New Year's Day - yuck!  It's a sinus thing that continues to plague me so I haven't accomplished much in the way of work; a sinus headache can take all the energy out of doing anything!

Anyway, I am better and slowly getting my desk cleared and organized again, and my focus back on writing.  I have good feelings about positive accomplishment in 2012, and I promise to share any and all good news here!

Working It Out

Sometimes - in my eagerness to constantly produce - I stress myself out with too many projects.  Well, I've just experienced the ultimate in that exercise.

I have been busy with queries and the synopsis and the sending out to agents and publishers, all in the hope of getting my first novel sold.  At the same time, I was researching and trying to draft my second novel - totally new ground for me as far as the content, so quite absorbing for my brain.  In addition, I have tried to keep up this blog, work on several essays and short stories for submission to other publications.  All this while attempting to keep current on all the other issues and chores of my life.

Not working.

I became so stressed that I didn't even want to pick up a pen and do my daily entry for my journal.  The thing I love to do became the thing I dreaded.  Then, the day came when I just sat staring at my computer screen and had no energy or interest in typing a single word.

It took me a few days to work out what my problem was; I needed to decide on one thing to work on now and give it my best.  I chose the most obvious for me; get the first novel sold.  I will still be doing quick entries in here - as I find time - and, of course, you will be the first to know when that novel is on its way to press!

I'm enjoying life more in the last few weeks, and even got energized to write a short story this morning.  When I have time, I can do that.  And the great thing is - I'm enjoying writing again.

My Veterans Day Salute

My salute begins with a huge "thank you" to all who have served or are presently serving our country.  I am ever grateful for your protection and devotion to duty.  And, to all our close friends who have served, I know what your work and sacrifice meant, and you are all heroes to me.

The focus of my salute today, though, is to one particular veteran; my husband.  While in the U.S. Navy, he braved combat duty in Vietnam twice, once before we were married and, again, a few months after our wedding.  The Vietnam War was new to everyone when he served his first tour, not monopolizing the headlines or causing protests at home.  In his letters to me, he didn't talk about the action much.  In later years, I understood why.

Unlike his father, my husband didn't come home to cheering crowds or waving flags.  By the time he was discharged, Vietnam had become a "dirty word" at home, and he was vilified for having been there.  He had lost his two best childhood friends in the war, and seen much more that prompted nightmares.  But no one wanted to hear about it.

It took decades before the public began acknowledging what our military endured in Vietnam and to give thanks to those men and women for their sacrifice.  My husband could finally wear his Vietnam Veteran status with honor, and there were many times he teared up when someone would thank him for his service there.

At the Vietnam Memorial in Washington, I have had to explain to our children why Daddy was crying as he stood there remembering those who fell.  He still suffers from medical problems, including PTSD. And it has only been recently that he has shared with me what really happened during that war, and when he did, we wept together.  But he left the house this morning proudly wearing his Vietnam Service medal.  What I've witnessed in him, and the way he survived, give me even more reasons to be proud of him.

I am only one of hundreds of thousands of Veteran relatives, no matter where their loved ones served, who know how much this day means to them.  Don't pass up an opportunity today to salute and thank a veteran.  And don't ever forget how lucky we are that they accepted the call.

An Anniversary Message

On this day nine years ago, our only son stood with the woman he loved, at the altar of an historic church in Lexington, Virginia, and vowed to love and honor her for life.  It was a perfect fall day, and we rejoiced at their union.  From the time we met Sande, we considered her the perfect mate for Sean; it took him a few years to figure it out.

He met her in a drama class at Florida State University and they became friends first, always the best way to discover a relationship, I think.  It wasn't until they were both graduates pursuing their careers, she in California and he in Chicago, that the spark ignited.

Since their marriage, their lives have taken several sharp turns and detours, some brought on by circumstances they couldn't avoid, and others by choices they made for the better.  They've managed to weather all of them. 

Adding to our delight, they completed their family nearly five years ago with the arrival of Fletcher.  That tiny dynamo gives another dimension to their lives, weaving entertainment, exasperation, exhaustion, but ultimately fulfillment into their world.  Observing them as they learn all the pitfalls and triumphs of parenthood brings back memories of Sean's childhood but also shows me how much more today's world demands when it comes to raising children.  I applaud their efforts.

In their hundred+-year-old bungalow, they've created a happy menagerie that includes cats and dogs, where even on the most chaotic of days, it is clear a loving family resides.  And it just seemed right, on their special day today, to tell them that I never cease to admire how they make it all work.

Sande and Sean, you are unique to yourselves, unique to our family, and we're all richer because you chose each other.  Happy Anniversary!